Posted in Dark side of the moon

A time for us

There are many moments in a relationship that we are driven to compete with our partners. Our family, friends or even our job become the center of the sensitive issues. We are fighting on how much time we should spend to one another. We begin to selfishly demand for time, that sometimes we have so little of. Most people are arguing on how important spending time with one another. Competition and jealousy is like a poisons that kill a relationship. Sometimes we found out how devastating they are when its too late.

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Physical presence is very important to a relationship. But in this demanding and challenging world, we should understand our demands. We can spend the day with someone but our hearts and minds are wandering around and far from the person beside us. But we can also spend just a few minutes to that person, and yet, make you feel important and loved.   It’s not a question of how much time we spend with the people we love, but the quality of time that we spend with them. It is not the amount of time that we put into loving someone but it’s the amount of love that we put in the time we spend to that person. When we are challenged with our relationship. We tempt to go away just to prove what we want, to satisfy our ego and hurt the people who love us.

Posted in Dark side of the moon

Let us love ourselves

When someone we love betrays us, we sometimes thought that its already end of the world. So many questions that does not have an answer and there’s always this lingering pain.  A pain that seems never go away no matter what we do. There are always traces of that person in our thoughts and we always look back with regret, regret a lot of things that we have done and never done.

I believe that the most difficult thing that we can do is to forgive those who hurt us. I honestly believe that the first step is forgiveness. Let us forgive ourselves for loving too much, and for allowing others to hurt us. Learn to forgive others for betraying, confusing and hurting us. Instead of blame, let us allow ourselves to receive the gift of forgiveness. This is the only way to the path of healing.

Instead of searching for an answer and asking the reason why people leave us, we should think of ourselves and realize our worth and believe that we deserve someone better. If someone betrays us for who we are, then that person is looking for someone that we are not. We simply do not deserve them.

We have to give ourselves a permission to heal. Let us not waste our time and energy to those who never appreciate our presence. Let us love ourselves and we should tell to ourselves that we don’t deserve to be treated this way! Live our life not relying on others for our happiness but faith on ourselves.

We are all beautiful and we deserve to be happy.

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Learn from our experiences and know that no matter how long we spend loving someone who betrayed us, there are always enough time to pick up the pieces. Forgive, trust and eventually find love again.

 

Posted in Dark side of the moon

Life is what we make it

When we are talking about feelings, we shouldn’t think of diplomas, educational attainment or status in life. This feeling sets themselves apart from what is tangible and measurable by money or intelligence. In most instances, heart and not mind is breaking the rules. There are times when our mind says what is right, but our heart is so stubborn.

Even we are aware that we are at the losing end, we let ourselves involved to a situation that is no permanence. Life leaves us with no options but to live a miserable life.

I believe that this is the line that would end. I should have a relationship with countless men who are most of them, I became the subject of their fantasy and desire. I did put an end to this quest because I know what could be lie on the boundary that I’m trying to cross.

 

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There’s nothing wrong on what we feel, what makes it wrong is when we act foolishly to justify and satisfy our desires. We should not let our heart to rule over our mind. There’s nothing wrong in looking with someone we love, but it is better to love someone who can love us back just as much without breaking the rules. Someone we can be with, without pushing others at the side. Someone who can made us feel important, someone who can love us in a different way and someone we can share our lives with, forever.

Its just a matter of time. Life is a matter of choice and not a chance. Life is what we make it.

Posted in Behind Closed Doors, Dark side of the moon

What would be my turning point?

This post maybe too personal, I may not elaborate further just to protect the life of others.

I could not find a word to express the pain! I become obsessed with my own misery.  In my most broken time, it always runs through my mind all the desperate and abusive things that happen, it may physically or mentally.

I was in a world where no one wanted to live with. I felt worthless all the time.

Being once an abandoned, In my very innocent mind, I don’t have any means to get through from the world I was.  Every day, I was scared and I find my self crying all night long, I could not think of anything.  I grow up alone, no one to talk to, no one protect me on the cruelty of life, neither somebody at my side. This is the adversity of life that i could not explain.

Despite of this, I never stop dreaming. Every day is a struggle but i have to face it! I never stop believing that one day i will overcome all these.

 

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At my lowest, I always found myself in front of my laptop.  Expressing thoughts that only me could imagine. Sometimes i may live in a fantasy as i know my thoughts can relieved me. I have so many friends but because i used to live alone, i always ended up in my room.  I am not used to have someone to comfort me.  I am not also asking for a sympathy.

I am known to be somebody who you can turn to, but strange may seem, i could not help myself!

At this age, am still asking myself… What would be my turning point?

 

 

 

 

 

Posted in Dark side of the moon

God knows what’s best for us♥♥♥♥♥

Like Women, Men can also make signs that are difficult to comprehend. It is true that there’s difference between somebody you wants to and somebody who would do anything to keep you. The later may like a real love at first but it is could also be selfishly motivated. Sometimes it is better to believe people on what they do than what they say. You might find this hard to accept but people may say they loves you not because they really do.

Sometimes we make ourselves believe that someone loved us. Love is when someone’s happiness is more important than ours. If we truly love someone, we don’t allow ourselves to be the reason to other’s become heart stumble. Let us always remember that love more than ourselves is a decision, it is a decision when we choose to love or not to love someone and this decision should not be based on how we feel but on how we know and what we believe is right. When feelings and emotions gets too strong it is always sensible to pray for peace, clarity and direction. God knows what’s best for us and one should find comfort in knowing that we are exactly what God want us to be now for a good reason.

19401635_1741812269169341_51912579_oTime and again, we cannot forget the people we love, we just need to accept what God have gives us without bitterness but gratitude for allowing us to experience love.

Sometimes moving on is not about forgetting the person that hurt us. Moving on is giving ourselves to love someone who is more deserving. Someone who make loving easy and definitely worth it.

 

Posted in Dark side of the moon

Life goes on and on.

In this modern days and age saying I love you to many is just saying Hello. Somewhere along the way it have lost the real meaning of love. I remember a young girl saying being in love with someone is when you care deeply with someone that their being is really matters to you. Seeing them happy makes you happy and you would do anything to keep them happy even it means sacrificing your own happiness. Love is when you give up your life for that person. This may seem like a fairy tale definition but I believe that love is more ways than want, it is more about be with other person than ourselves.

There are daggers in a smile of someone, because not all says it mean it. They just make a preposition that you cannot resists. It is because they knew that you love them, they only took advantage of every situation.

I believe there’s nothing wrong in loving a person, it is what we do when we think we really love the person but sometimes lead us to the wrong decision that we regret in the end and carry a long life consequences. Sometimes we do follow our heart but we need to bring our brain with us. No matter how hopeless, lonely and empty life seems to be, it is not!

15055831_1260938210633556_79383082913964349_nNo one dies in shame, there is a lesson in every mistake that we make and it is not what happen in our life that defines us, but how we respond to that to reveal our true character. Remember, it is not important of how others think of us, what is important is who we are in Christ. He sees us in a way that no else does. He understands us that nobody else does.

There is hope in all of this. You are not alone in this struggle. There are people around who are concerned. Don’t lose hope for it is hope that leads us to the truth.

This is not the end of our story, God is bigger than our problems and it is when we allow our faith to be bigger than our fears that find peace in all this madness that breaks our hearts.